FreeDarko Presents: The Disciples Of Clyde NBA Podcast

 

 Standard Podcast [23:21m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

Ken stayed up late and recorded his thoughts on the draft for YOU. He was tired and cranky, but YOU want to hear about the NBA, so he took one for the team.

He covered the trades and the vibe of the top ten, with a philosophical look at how we get all the information on these players from the great Chad Ford, the great Johnathan Givony, and all their great imitators.

Then Ken goes old school and talks about the Knicks!  He expresses optimism about Jordan Hill and is happy to have him in the fold.

Finally, a special shout-out to Alan Hahn of Newsday and his Knicks Fix blog, as well as Seth and the Posting and Toasting family; those are the places Ken went to get psyched for the draft and he hopes that all of you have a beat writer and a fan blog, respectively, that kick so much ass.

For all of you who were wondering if we had anything to do with the circumstances that brought our podcast-partner’s namesake to our team of choice, so his name can be announced regularly next year by our namesake:

Yes, of course we did.  Donnie called us before he pulled the trigger on the deal, to make sure it wouldn’t be weird for us.  Donnie Walsh is obviously a huge fan of ours, and we of his, so we told him don’t worry, it wouldn’t be that weird.

Then Q called us to complain that we didn’t stand up for him.  That was awkward, mostly for Ken, for reasons best left unsaid in public.  Needless to say, you’re right, Q, and Ken should apologize.

Sources indicate that Cavs GM Danny Ferry had no idea that Vince Carter, who would actually help them win playoff games, could be acquired for such a modest sum and sent a fax to the NBA league office attempting to undo the last two days of trades across the league.

The league does not normally accommodate such requests, but Danny Ferry is a well known crybaby who will pout for the rest of the off-season if he doesn’t get his way and the NBA just wants some peace and quiet. Once the Vince Carter and Shaq trades are undone the Cavs will likely send Ben Wallace and Sasha Pavlovic to the Nets instead of the Suns, adding young forward JJ Hickson and a future first round draft pick to entice the Nets to make a deal.

Congratulations to the Cavs for such an astute deal that will surely make them title favorites next season!

More to come . . .

The DOC phone lines are burning up!

There is scuttlebutt that the reason for Rajon Rondo’s reported “attitude problem” this past season stems from a previously dormant genetic abnormality that caused him to turn into a gregarious werewolf. The problem is exacerbated by Rondo’s best friend Worldwide Wes, who has encouraged the young point guard to disregard his teammates and put up high scoring numbers that will generate lucrative endorsement contracts. Worldwide Wes also convinced Rondo to dump his brunette girlfriend in favor of a glamorous blonde and to surf on top of a van for some reason.

More to come . . .

Soylent Green is people!

We just got off the phone with Chad Ford’s lawyer.

He says please stop calling Chad Ford, as Chad Ford is quite busy today.

Sources say that Chad Ford’s lawyer is close to signing a three-year deal with the Los Angeles Clippers, to defend Blake Griffin’s future charges of murdering Zach Randolph and Chris Kaman.

Watch out for the Houston Rockets. Sources say they have been really active the past 24 hours, having contacted the Grizzlies, Thunder, Kings and Timberwolves about hitting a strip club in the hours after Thursday evening’s draft. Sources also claim that Darryl Morey brings $60 in singles when he goes to a strip club and prefers lap-dances from the less attractive strippers who make up for their lack of physical gifts with enthusiasm.

More to come . . .

According to the player’s player agent, Don Nelson and the Warriors are said to be in love with Arizona big man Jordan Hill. Nelson has told confidants that he thinks Hill is a really great listener with nice eyes.

More to come . . .

Check back all day for continual updates!!!

According to an interview he gave late Wednsday on ESPN, Stephen Curry believes that his father’s experience in pro basketball has helped him throughout this draft process. This puts to bed speculation that his father’s experience in pro basketball has turned the draft process into an orgy of pain and homicidal rage, interrupted only briefly by hallucinations experienced during auto-erotic-asphyxiation in the men’s room of a Denny’s.

The DOC has placed calls out to three NBA executives to confirm whether Curry has ever even eaten at a Denny’s.  The lack of a response has spoken volumes.

More to come . . .

 

 Standard Podcast [60:50m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

In this episode, Dan is joined by Shoals and the Recluse from FreeDarko, along with special guest Eric Freeman from the Baseline.

Topics:

- The pre-draft trade by the Wolves and Wizards
- The pre-draft trade by the Spurs and Bucks
- The Bucks, for longer than the Bucks have ever been discussed on any podcast ever (prove me wrong, Internet!)
- Brandon Jennings, Ricky Rubio, Jordan Hill, and other players in the draft

The Dan finishes things off by depressing everyone, as is his wont.

Songs:

Soundgarden - “Outshined”
What Made Milwaukee Famous - “Resistance St.”
Gang Starr - “Just to Get a Rep”
Deerhoof - “Whither the Invisible Birds?”
Man or Astroman? - “Principles Unknown”
Peanut Butter Wolf and Charizma - “Devotion ‘92″