For your Friday reading pleasure, I now present the Disciples of Clyde Guide on How to Tell You Are a Hardcore, Obsessive NBA Fan:
- You have purposely watched a Warriors-Clippers game just to see what Anthony Randolph was going to do
- You have had a heated debate (either in person or online) about Ramon Sessions, Acie Law, or Luol Deng
- You cringe every time someone on TV talks about points per game for a team without mentioning anything about pace
- You have made a joke with Pops Mensah-Bonsu, Cheikh Samb, or Mardy Collins as the punch line
- You can name five people on the Grizzlies, Bucks, and Kings, respectively
- You see a ridiculous stat line and inadvertently say “Whoa boy!”
- You can in no time at all write a reasonably coherent paragraph about the Mid-Level Exception
- You have actually written Bill Simmons an email begging him to write another NBA column
- You agree with the people who write columns or record podcasts making fun of college basketball right when the tournament starts
- You not only can fill in these blanks “If you’re ready like ________ then I’m in there like ________” but you own the t-shirt
- You are intimately familiar with Lawler’s Law, and you live nowhere near Los Angeles
- You know the player that eats babies, and wishes he were eating more babies this year
- You wore an Undrcrwn UNLV shirt on a date, secretly hoping the girl will not only notice the shirt but know what it is (and maybe even make a reference to the Undrcrwn O-Face Shirt) thus signifying that this is the girl you are meant to marry (um, okay, so maybe that was just me. Maybe this is a good place to stop.)
